To Sing for the Divine
My name is Sati. All my life I was dreaming to find a true Love, and about 10 years ago my dream came true - after 5-6 months of practicing the meditations, I had a first experience of my Spiritual Essance and Divine Connection. Since that time I am learning to Love Unconditionally and to deepen my experience by cultivating the desire to be of service and developing the capacities to do it in a better and better way. And one of the best ways to be of service is to express the Essance through art. Sometimes I am doing videos, but mainly I am interested in the sound - to feel the sound, to play music and sing and offer the sound to the Divine. I love to do piano improvisations and to play with other musicians who have similar intentions. Since last 3 years I am living in Vrindavan and learning Indian Classical Music (Khayal) - classical ragas and Vrindavan bhajans.
It is interesting how my way of spiritual mysticism includes both - the freedom to explore and have my own experienced and vaishnava tradition. In my young age I was iniciated in ISKCON and was fully religious in the ISKCON way, but was unable to fulfill the expectations of the society and got deeply disappointed with the organisation too. I was quite a good member before I came to Vrindavan the 1st time. After getting in contact with the Deep Mystical Energy of Vraj my perception of spirituality changed - I no longer had a taste for sadhana and preaching, I ve got a desire to feel and love. Yet because of the life circumstances and lack of guidence I didn't know what to do and finaly left my spiritual way. After many experiences I ve met Hari and regected all my previous conceptions. I was lucky, because between ISKCON and comming in contact with Hari and His method I had a lot of other religious, mystical and psihodelic experiences, so it was quite easy for me to reject everything I knew before and start experimenting with something totally new. I had 2 great motivations – the desperate desire for love and big health problem so I had to make my spiritual practice my main priority.
So 4 years ago, after I got cured and could walk again, I decided to come to Vrindavan. And I came in a different way then before - I dicided not to believe anything I am told, but to feel and experience everything here with the new tools I ve got from Hari. So when I came to Vrindavan - I could not believe my eyes - Vrindavan with Radha and Krishna and Gopies and Rasa Lila and 6 Goswamis and Mira and Saints - it was no longer a fairy tale - it came out alive, full of Magic and Divine Energy and Bliss – all this Personalities are Really Present Here and ready to Communicate! So I ended up living Here. I ve got a Music Teacher who is not only a Great Singer, but a very Enlightened Pure Personality and my Guide in the Brijbhasi Culture. He totally understands who I am and helps me on my way to the beauty, purity and depth of my singing. During my exploration and experimenting I have found out that many traditions of original Vaishnava Culture are very beautiful and deep and natural and resonate with me - deepen my experiences and give a lot of inspiration. But mostly I avoid rituals and social religious events... I am living very closed private life with full freedom of doing whatever I want. Although there are difficulties and culture differences, I feel Vrindavan is my Home. And how is it possible? Its all about Love and Love is Radharani Herself. Her beautiful Energy and Qualities are the main inspiration of my life. I always pray to Her so that I learn to Love Unconditionally and give myself fully to my Beloved – like She does. I think that’s why I am Here. So this is the song glorifying Srimati Radharani. Hope, I can also sing for our Deities in our New Temple soon!